Pages

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Myths about newborns that I was told that are total crap

It's funny and I laugh while I write this post because I remember how nervous I was about having Cannen.  The birth itself and bringing him home terrified me.  I had this constant daydream where I got the baby home, put the carseat down, sat on the couch and looked at my baby and literally just thought "umm... uhh... so now what do we do with him....?"
Ofcourse, when you get pregnant, everyone and their mom gives you all the unsolicited advice in the world.  I already wrote a post debunking pregnancy myths and now I will attempt to put other new moms at ease by telling you which things about newborns that I've noticed aren't so true.  Here goes.

1) Maternal instinct.  I think I'm still waiting for this.  So many people tell you about maternal instinct and how it will kick in when you get the baby home but um, atleast for me, not really.  I got Cannen home and literally began wondering how this baby was going to eat, sleep and generally survive.  I'm still so confused by so many things.  Maybe it's just a general lack of common sense.... I'll have to look into that.

2) Preparing for birth.  "make sure you do this and this and this and this and this and this before you go in to labor because you want to be prepared."    .....You won't be prepared. Don't waste your time.  Ignorance is bliss.

3) "oh, he's probably just colic-y".  This one is so annoying.  99% of babies do not have colic.  They aren't colic-y.  Just because your baby is crying for seemingly no reason doesn't mean that they have colic. But moms LOVE to use this word.

4) Babies smell so sweet.  5 minutes after their bath? Yes. Johnson&Johnson baby lotion smells so great.  Other than that babies smell like spoiled milk and poop.  The catch is that even when your baby does smell like sour milk, you still love his smell because your his mama.

5) "Everything will go back to normal once you get home and get used to things."  .....uhh.... except for the BABY that lives with you now....

6) Newborns sleep all day.  This is false.  Babies sleep a lot but they don't eat-sleep-eat-back to sleep-diaper change-back to sleep... it's just not like that.  He's awake a lot! Just awake and wanting to snuggle! I literally bought into it when everyone told me that Cannen would just sleep all the time and that his waketime would be like a total of 30 minutes a day haha

So thats what I've learned so far from being a mama.  If this keeps up I seriously think I'll have enough to write a book.
It's already been a MONTH since Cannen was born!  Time seriously flies.  Like my earlier blog said, the first couple weeks were definitely the hardest of my life but now that we're getting into a groove with him, things are just going SO well.
He's down to only waking up twice a night, and last night he only woke up once!  Usually it's about 2am and 5am that he whines, I feed him, and then he falls right back to sleep.  Last night it was one feeding around 4am.  So I'm really hoping that Babywise starts working it's magic and that in another couple weeks we can drop his middle of the night feedings all together.  Other than that, we're on a strict 3 hour schedule for feedings and Cannen is taking to the schedule really really well.  He's doing great and a really happy baby... and because of that, Eric and I are really happy parents :)

Other things going on:
Eric is in the middle of the school semester and stressed and overwhelmed to say the least.  It's definitely proved to be a hard semester for him and his classes are tough.  However, he's handling everything with more grace and patience than I ever could.  He's in class all day and then comes home to a newborn and still has crazy amounts of work to do.  I'm certain that it's just an answer to my many prayers that Eric would have a successful school year and that the stress wouldn't bring him down.  He has this way of not letting things effect him as much as you think they should.  No matter what, at the end of the day, he walks through the door with a smile on his face and beelines to me and Cannen to give us both a kiss. I look at him and see all the potential in the world and his constant support and grace is truly inspiring for me.  

We started a new small group through our church which is already something that we so look forward to every week.  We've began some new friendships and furthered others and we can't wait to see where God will lead us and the other couples.  Since we got married Eric and I have always prayed that we would find the right small group and it's taken a year to really work itself out.  A few options ended up being on nights where Eric had class or I had work.  A few other options just felt a bit uncomfortable for us because it seemed that there weren't many people our age in our same place of life.  23 years old and married with a baby on the way isn't the norm.  But, again, God answered our prayers and we're so thankful to Him for that.  There is another couple who has a baby just a few weeks older than Cannen and so even he has found his first little friend!  All around it's just such a blessing.  

As for me, there isn't much to say except the tales of being a new mom.  Spiritually, I feel that I'm starting to understand more and more who God wants me to be as both a wife and a mom.  I never had the strongest prayer life but since Cannen was born I feel like I'm constantly saying little prayers throughout the day.  Prayer is what gets me through the harder days and I can't help but constantly thank God on the easier days. I had been so concerned and scared for Eric and I's relationship.  Just nervous that with the baby and school and everything else going on that we would lose sight of our marriage and grow distant.  Our minds are constantly on different things and our day to day priorities are different.  And in the end, yes, it has effected our marriage.  And I'll be honest, it's been really hard for me.  But it hasn't been as much of a bad change as just a change in general.  It takes getting used to and working through it and where before it was just easy, now it takes more work.  I wouldn't change anything for the world though.  I still have the most incredible husband and he still shows me he loves me in more ways than I can count a day.  And I have a beautiful baby.  And all around and incredibly blessed life... I'm still learning how to juggle it all but I'm just so thankful to God that I have it all to juggle in the first place.